Sweet Dee
A jizzillion thanks to all who submitted their stories to the first issue of Burn Book!!! Oh man oh man Div III is a party. In my pants. My slut pants.
So tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Sarah and Maria and Nat are coming down from New York to hang out at Hampshire with me! This will be the third Thanksgiving break in a row that I spend time with those two ladies. It’s a tradition I’ve enjoyed very much. And Nat is a great new addition because apparently he’s a good cook!
As for “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” I am having a ball with Season 5 (omg the Kitten Mittons commercial), but I can’t help but get frustrated by some of the situations with Dee. See, if she was the one moral character and they all made fun of her for that, it would make sense. But she’s just as shameless and despicable as the rest of them—yet they put her down whenever she tries to share funny/horrifying ideas (ideas that, if suggested by one of the guys, would’ve been met with enthusiasm).
I guess, for me, it just hits too close to home.
Season 5, Episode 1:
Dee: You guys, I have huge news!
(The guys argue about “Bird Law” in this country.)
Dee Hello? You guys!
(The guys argue.)
Dee: You guys, I’m serious, I have HUGE news here!
(The guys argue.)
(Frank enters.)
Frank: Okay, I’ve got great news here.
(All guys turn to him.)
Guys: Ho! Frank’s got news! News! News! News! News! News! News!
Frank: I just bought a house…at a foreclosure auction!
Mac: Holy shit! That’s amazing!
Dee: Oh, is it? Is it AMAZING?
Charlie: Now you’re not moving out, are ya?
Frank: No no no no no! I bought this as an investment! I bought it on the cheap!
Mac: Ah, you might’ve missed the boat on that, Frank. Not the best time to invest, I don’t think.
Frank: I beg to differ with you. NOW is the time to TIME to invest, because all the prices are low. As soon as the market turns around, I’m gonna make a boatload.
Guys: YEAH!!
Dennis: He’s talking about flippin’ the house. That’s exciting.
Charlie: MONEY! MONEY!
Guys: (general yelling)
Dee: I’M HAVING A BABY.
(Long silence.)
Frank: Do yourself a favor, and flush it out.
Dee: No, that’s not—flush it out? No, I’m not PREGNANT—I answered an ad for a couple who wants a surrogate. See, people who can’t have kids are willing to pay a shitload of money to people like myself who can carry it for them!
(Pause.)
Charlie: Wait, what’s going on? You’re carrying someone’s baby somewhere?
Frank: Hold—hold it. I am NOT spending money on another little bastard. I did that already, TWICE.
Dee: No, they’re KEEPING the baby. It’s THEIR baby. How are you guys not understanding this?
Dennis: Uh, Dee—before you continue this babbling, does your thing involve us in any way, or were you just kinda (makes a talking motion with his hand) at us?
Dee: Well, no it’s just—that’s huge news! So I figured you guys might wanna know.
Mac: It doesn’t matter! Let’s just talk about the house!
Dennis: Hold on a second—now, Dee being pregnant is actually pretty big news. We could take the house idea and the baby idea and merge the two things!
Charlie: But this is about money, though—let’s just stick with one. That’s cleaner, right?
Dennis: But it might be interesting—
Frank: HOUSE.
Dennis: But I’m just saying—
Frank: HOUSE!
Dennis: I don’t know exactly HOW we would take the two ideas and—
Frank/Charlie/Mac: HOUSE!
Dennis: But I think we co—
Frank/Charlie/Mac: HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE!
Dennis: Just the house, then?
All guys: HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE!
(They begin to shoo Dee away with their hands.)
All guys: HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE! HOUSE! FLUSH! FLUSH! FLUSH! FLUSH!
(Exit Dee.)
November 25th, 2009 at 3:27 am
Agreed. It’s Always Sunny was a LOT funnier when she was a real character and they weren’t lazy about writing women. Those were the good days.
I think my favorite might be when she starts boxing and taking steroids.
November 25th, 2009 at 1:19 pm
Tomorrow isn’t ONLY Thanksgiving, you shit head.
November 26th, 2009 at 4:12 pm
Never seen this show. Maybe I will someday? I imagine it would be more fun watching it with other people.
Oh well, back to Twin Peaks.
November 29th, 2009 at 2:40 am
Doyle: THANK YOU. Thank you. I’m glad it’s not just me.
Phoebe: I was GOING to mention your birthday, but then I thought you might be embarrassed by that. I am very sorry. I hope it was a GOOD birthday/turkey day, and that you got/get my package.
Dylan: I don’t know what you’d think of it, but I’ve enjoyed it a lot. Most of all when I watched it with Ian and Sarah G while living in St Paul two summers ago.
November 30th, 2009 at 11:58 am
AHHHHHHHHH I just started watching It’s Always Sunny with a bunch of boys and IT’S TRUE that the writers are extremely lazy about female characters in general. Call me a crazy feminist (as my friends do) but every episode has a dumb girl character in it whose only purpose is to support someone’s ego. REALLY really dumb girls. Or just stereotyped girls. It makes me kind of not want to watch it anymore, even though Charlie is probably the best thing on TV.
December 4th, 2009 at 8:40 pm
Madelyn, Crazy Feminist is my middle name. Actually, I believe the term most frequently applied to me in high school was “feminazi.” Catchy. But THANK YOU for seeing the same things that I see in It’s Always Sunny. I’m NOT SAYING that the show isn’t funny; it’s just, I can’t help but notice that Dee’s character (and lots of the other female characters who come and go) are, at least sometimes, obnoxious stereotypes. But usually when you try to point out an issue of sexism or racism or etc.-ism in pop culture, people just get really defensive because they think you’re shitting all over their favorite show and that the issue is just that you have no sense of humor.
Charlie is by far my favorite character on the show. He’s absurd.